I talked to Karen a week before she passed.  She had long covid, which had forced her to retire, had taken away her ability to read anything of length, and left her on oxygen and bed ridden. She fell going to or from the bathroom, and was found after a couple days when her former wife had called for a wellness check. i remember her in better times, when she wore my ring. 

The last time i saw Phil he was under a hundred pounds, had food in front of him cancer had left him uninterested in eating. He was half deaf, in obvious pain, and told me I'd probably never see him again.  He was right.  He died two days later. 

Fuck Cancer

Rusty was passed out in his hospital bed, with his glasses and the Browns game on.  He'd gone in for cancer surgery and afterword they discovered his heart was shot. He needs a heart transplant, only to be eligible you need to be cancer-free for two years, as spare hearts are too rare to just give them out to someone who is going to die of other causes.  He had fourteen gallons of fluid taken out right after his surgery.  He's skin and bones and they're pretty sure he's too weak to survive anything that might keep his heart beating. I let him sleep, because asleep he's comfortable

Fuck Cancer

I saw Carl too.  He was skinny the day I met him but he's really skinny now.  Carl spent most of last week on a ventilator for emphysema.  Yeah, he smoked like a chimney, so it's possible to argue he had this coming.  But it's not pretty, as he has a family who needs him, and he's one of the good guys.  Seems like the bad guys never get it. 

2024 had been a terrible year for me, and that's not talking about the election.   It can't end fast enough, but i have a bad feeling that 2024 isn't through fucking with me yet.