I've been told over and over "Don't be angry." "You're too angry." "You need to let go of your anger." And the latest: "You need to transcend your anger."

This morning I've been trying to avoid feeling anger over an email. Avoid, avoid, avoid.

I finally stopped and thought: it's okay to feel angry. I let myself feel it.

It is gone instantly. No anger. Just sadness.

I talk to it. "Not anger?"

"No."

"Sad?"

"Yes."

Oh. "Defense mechanism?"

Assent.