Literary Karaoke

The Best of The Week

1. The people from Jersey City have a special glint in their eyes. This is how they recognize each other in Manhattan. If you cross them, they will get the governor of NJ to conduct a “traffic study” in your living room.


2. If you can catch a pigeon, it has to give you five wishes.

I caught a pigeon, but it only gave me one wish. I am now the proud owner of an ice cream sandwich. It sits in prominent position on my shelf.


3. If you find a telephone pole and climb it, and you put your ear close to the wire, you can listen to phone conversations. But you have to do this when the linemen are not prowling. They defend their territory fiercely. They can whistle to the pole and it will shake you off and you will fall into a bag and the linemen will take you and throw you in the big dump where all the dead telephone poles go.

Also you have to find one. Most phone lines in NYC are underground. Try an outer-edge street in Queens or…

The Composer is Dead
By Lemony Snicket
Illustrated by Carson Ellis
Music by Nathan Stookey
HarperCollens Children's Books, 2009

The Composer is Dead is a children's picture book intended to introduce young children to the instruments of the orchestra, much in the fashion of Peter and the Wolf. It comes with a CD audiobook read by Lemony Snicket with elaborate musical accompaniment.


Sometimes the Universe will shock you with its timing. Sometimes it will simply shock you.

On the morning of June 22, 2015, 61-year-old James Horner climbed into the cockpit of his Embraer EMB 312 Tucano turboprop airplane. He soared into the sky, but one must presume something went terribly wrong, for this latter-day Icarus came crashing down in southern California's Los Padres National Forest.

The earliest reports, some twelve hours later, simply related that a plane…