Don't know where this "writers' site" crap came from but it sure as hell isn't in the prospectus.

The Best of The Week

Dear moJoe:

What's my fucking problem?

-- Credulous in Cambridge

Dear C in C,

Due to your penchant for simpleminded, cyclopean vagueness I had to retain the services of my constant companion and trusty manservant, Mr. ToasterLeavings. I instructed Mr. ToasterLeavings to sit outside of your house and take pictures of your activities through the windows and then to break into and search your house after you left for work.

In short, I'd say among the more prominent problems are cheap locks, a curious lack of blinds or curtains and more notably; a rather bizarre new problem with a wide scope of outcomes that range from a very expensive blackmail arrangement to a very long stay in jail. I'm sure you understand what I am speaking of, doubtless I need not mention it here or you can pile a few extra problems onto this mess that you call life.

In short,

We are approaching a seismic shift in psychiatry. I am now going out on a limb to predict the direction we will go in.

The allopathic medical community will resist, including many psychiatrists. But it is the neurobiologists and brain imaging and rest of the psychiatrists who will prevail. If the creek don't rise and we aren't hit by a giant asteroid, nuclear winter, devolve into fighting over the remaining arable land as the world heats up....

I have…

I think it was the fall of 1980, maybe 1981 and I fresh out of the crotch and baby number one had just been delivered by my beautiful, lovely teen age bride. I remember being scared out of my wits since between the both of us we had little in the way of parenting experience and weren’t quite prepared for what lay in store.

So, what’s a young couple to do? For starters I found myself a somewhat decent job working in the caverns of…