Yesterday was very productive. I got a lot of things done that I've been wanting to do. Today my drive has waned. I need some time to relax before I go back into work tomorrow. It's a kind of grind and repetition that I have to avoid thinking about. I finished the chapter I had been working on, I redid the opening and I'm much happier with the way that it turned out. I like to give my characters my problems, but tweak them to move the story along. When I was still married we had talked about another baby, knowing how crazy it was. I still kind of want another baby, but I don't really, I just like the idea of it. To get myself through this I gave two couples similar circumstances. One couple is established, older, and financially secure. He wants a baby and his wife is reluctant. The second couple is extremely young. They love each other, she wants a baby and he has a thing for pregnant women.
His parents talk about him and his girlfriend, another son of theirs got his girlfriend pregnant, their granddaughter is just eight days old and they think that his younger brother and his girlfriend are only seeing the cute and cuddly part of babies before they get to the squalling sleepless nights that most parents of babies endure at some point in time. Writing about sex can be fun, for the younger couple she doesn't get a thrill out of it the way that she could, but she doesn't know any better, wants a child, and loves him enough to accept what he's doing to her. When they're together her mind wanders and she pictures herself holding a baby and having him in the background helping her. He doesn't know she feels this way or isn't really into sex, he's getting laid and doesn't know enough to include her in the process. The older couple is much more experienced, they negotiate, they compromise, and it's fun to see how the different people act and react. Would love to write more, but trying to keep these short so I don't burn myself out.
Praying that this finds you well,
J
P.S. In the process of making a decision about my romantic future. Letting go is tough, but I owe it to myself to try and meet my needs and get more of what I want out of a relationship.