Also known as a
torture chamber. It is a place where hapless
college students are sent to consume henious,
toxic concotcions that are labeled as "food". Actually a
conspiracy to cheat
college students out of their
money before the "food" kills them.
There are other kinds of cafeterias than the
college cafeteria:
Each cafeteria, with the possible exception of the
restaurant cafeteria, inevitably has at least one
cafeteria lady. The kind of person that really doesn't look good in a
hair net. The kind of
person that you really don't want handling something you're about to put in your mouth.
Once you've been
standing in line long enough, your
tray will eventually accumulate a collection of substances which might, at some point in the past, have actually resembled something
edible. Now, however, they look to you like chatty
noders look to
EDB.
Whether or not you had any
choice as to which
noxious substances in particular made the
journey to your
plate is dependant on the type of cafeteria in which you find yourself.
School cafeterias are
notorious for having a choice only of whether you get
regular milk or
chocolate milk.
Everything else is unceremoniously dumped onto your tray. Sometimes, you don't even get a choice as to whether or not you actually
ingest the stuff - they actually made us take one bite of
everything before we could leave in my
first grade cafeteria. I cleverly got around this by swirling my
fork in each of the shapeless
masses on my tray - the
volume difference of a single 6-year-old
bite of food out of an entire
serving is kind of hard to
spot, so I managed to
escape to the
playground with a minimum of
gastrointestinal disturbance.
Things to watch out for in any non-restaurant cafeteria: