And they keep on coming......
At the Orchestra one day, a tuba player wanted to torture the drummer behind him, so he hid one of the drummer's sticks.
After looking around for a few minutes, with a frantic, wide-eyed expression, the drummer fell to his knees, flung his arms wide, and screamed to heaven:
"Finally! The miracle, after all these years! I'm a Conductor!"
How many drummers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Twenty. One to hold the bulb, and nineteen to drink until the room spins.
Why do guitarists put drumsticks on the dashboard of their car?
So they can park in the handicapped spot.
How is a drum solo like a sneeze?
You can tell it's coming, but you can't do anything about it.
Did you hear about the drummer who graduated from University?
Me neither
How can you tell a drummer is walking behind you?
You can hear his knuckles dragging on the ground.
Why do drummers have lots of kids?
They're terrible at the rhythm method.
Two drummers walk into a bar...
which is funny because you would have figured the second one would have seen the first bloke do it.
And my favourite (probably due to the fact it's more derogatory to bassists than drummers)
A man goes to an exotic tropical island for a holiday. As the boat nears the island, he notices the constant sound of drumming coming from the shore. As he gets off the boat, he asks the first native he sees how long the drumming will go on. The native looks about nervously and says "very bad when the drumming stops."
At the end of the day, the drumming is still going and is starting to get on his nerves. So, he asks another native when the drumming will stop. The native looks as if he's just been reminded of something very unpleasant. "Very bad when the drumming stops," he says, and hurries off.
After a couple of days with little sleep, our traveller is finally fed up, grabs the nearest native, slams him up against a tree, and shouts "What happens when the drumming stops?!!"
"Bass solo."