Findings:

• To a Poet, who would have me Praise certain Bad Poets, Imitators of His and Mine
• Friend, you have a lot to learn if you think loving me would be a bad idea.
• You haven't seen it and you don't understand. I have malice. I have cruelty. The little fire that's always been inside me isn't so little anymore.
• Or he'll just kick me in the face and scream abstract noises and dance around outside in his underwear and have sex with the neighbor's dog and try to fly by jumping off the toilet
• To anyone who this may have hurt, please forgive me. The darkness keeps calling and I must go.
• To me he is a daisy and I keep trying to count his petals
• He tells me that I could have his heart and I want to take it right then, slip it into my pocket and run
• I have always wanted someone to say to me what you just said
• Religion doesn't allow me to be who I am
• A letter to those who have impressed me
• I a man sad, with a linux box, a slow internet connection and friends who can not see the love in me bursting to get out.
• He will have the taste of warm ripe fruit in his mouth
• Who is the third who walks always beside you?
• the fire didn't hurt me, though---we're old friends
• To a beautiful woman who can't have ketchup
• Actors who have played Bruce Wayne / Batman
• Everything always comes back to me. Everything has always been my fault
• Dogs are for wimps who don't have the guts to bite people themselves
• My Fine Feathered Friends, Chapter 11: In Which We Have a Bit of Gardening Trouble
• I have always hated begonias
• I have built me a bean-stalk into your sky!
• His actions have already scarred American history.
• It's not worth thinking about. Have some tea. Come walk with me.
• In response to you telling me I have the bluest eyes you've ever seen
• How Spider-Man and His Amazing Friends wrecked my love life
• I have lots of gay friends
• I don't have any secrets. Now ask me if I have any lies.
• The Weddings I have Performed, or Why God is Gonna Kill Me
• Strangers have been, and continue to be, very kind to me. Thank you.
• I don't have a life; Everyone else wants to live my life for me
• It's hard to know what to say when a friend's parent they always hated suddenly dies
• How Could You Want Him (When You Know You Could Have Me)?
• American politicians who have studied abroad
• Always standing on the edge, you forced me in heart first
• I convert my crushes into friends, and from there to the status of Muse
• Friends who need you, and how not to deal with them
• Why do all the pretty things always run away from me?
• The friend who knows a lot about computers
• All my friends are nonconformists. They all dress like me.
• Life is like a strange, unpopular restaraunt filled with odd waiters who give you things you never asked for and don't always like.
• We're trying to have a baby
• Know your pets
• Don't ever lie. If you lie to your friends, they won't trust you, and you'll have nothing, and you'll never be safe.
• Strange things homeless people have said to me
• Girls who tell you they have a boyfriend
• Dogs that have owned me
• if you have love in your heart, then you are my friend
• Oh, False One, You Have Deceived Me
• You don't always have to disagree, or agree for that matter
• Could you have danced with me?
• This makes me ache. I have holes of aching.
• Who needs love when you can have death?
• She may be pretty and have more money than me but she doesn't write songs about you.
• Lady Evolution, why have you wronged me so?
• Have One On Me
• I would've taken an axe to it, but I'm pretty sure the dryad would have pulverized me
• Unless the enemy has studied his Agrippa... which I have!
• I have always been burning
• I've crossed lines of words and wire, and both have cut me deep
• It could have been me
• The dead eat it always, but the living who eat it die slowly
• i always want to go back. but i don't know if it's time yet. i have some things i have to do.
• i have excuses though and i always enumerate them for her
• Spider-Man and his Amazing Friends
• Saddest thing a woman friend ever told me
• When a boy comes over, always have something baking
• let me tell you about this friend of mine
• Glad To Have A Friend Like You
• always with me
• Trying to explain Everything to your non-Everythingite friends
• I always knew I would have a 21st birthday but I never thought I'd be 21
• Friends who fuck
• We Have Always Been The Party Of No
• In which Human Craig tries to debrief his alien friend
• When he was five, his father made him murder his imaginary friend.
• Your radical ideas about society, individualism, and religion have already occurred to others
• A reminder to drivers who do not have cruise control
• What kind of crummy friends did Proust have?
• My friend is dating someone who likes him far more than he likes her
• Things Fairy Tales have taught me
• Always have a backup
• I may not have had enough of me but I've had enough of you
• A Bunch of Guys Who Just Happen To Have Instruments
• Using a command line
• I wish you could have met me before I became food
• The shirt that always gets me hit on
• Professors who have contempt for their students
• Upon the death of Levon Helm and while considering his friends
• You, who said I could always count on you, forever
• For White Girls Who Have Considered Afro Hair Products/When the Conditioner is Enuf
• So long Arthur Miller! Who do I have to look up to now?
• Why is it that the alien mortal enemies of humanity always have some fatal flaw?
• Actors who have played Hitler
• What have you done for me lately?
• I guess that I am the one who has changed
• Things video games have taught me
• I have this mental image of God laughing at me.
• people do, on the whole, have the right to be who they want to be
• People who think they have to double-click everything
• If it were a snake, it would have bit me
• those who don't fit into the herd are always recognized
• In the real world, it is almost always women and not men who are waiting under windows
• We have always lived in the castle, Shirley
• I would have tried, but Charlotte kept Charlotte in the world of Charlotte and she barely heard me
• His socks do not have a smell, which is so courteous.
• You have the right to be angry at me for breaking my heart.
• war trophies for people who have never been to war
• Lefties who have no sense of humour
• I have always imagined that Paradise will be a kind of library
• Do not be surprised, I have always been your canvas, Argenis.
• You Don't Have To Say You Love Me
• please come stay with me in the forest so at least i have one person with whom i have no secrets
• I have no proof that he would ever want to kiss or destroy me.
• two guys who have killed scores of imaginary people
• For I have sworn thee fair, and thought thee bright, who art as black as hell, as dark as night.
• Those who have abandoned their dreams will discourage yours
• A book has always been my best friend
• I always told you I thought you were smarter than me
• I don't have a postmodern condition; I've always been like this
• The transition out of misery begins with discipline. You have always known this. It's time you resigned yourself to it.
• i am always awake. what do you require of me?
• this is why you always leave me, this is why you'll never go
• I don't know why but I always love episodes without words. like just something about them makes me feel calm or something..
• you can give up, but there will always be those who do not
• always remember this about the rules you have learned
• the helpless little thing with the dirty mouth who's always got something to say
• Platonic friends are always right
• We Have Always Lived in the Castle
• I have a friend
• a tech support story that a friend told me that you might find amusing
• I didn't always have this cool job
• Trying to be friends
• "Let's just be friends" does not give you permission to stalk me
• Whereas a Naked White Man, when I met one, always appear'd a new Object unto me
• I asked a friend to draw me, and I'm scared of what I'll see
• You were always so good to me
• I would a thousand times rather have had a simple cheap sandwich with a friend
• Lincoln advises a friend who is nervous about marriage, January 30, 1842
• Friends, Romans, Countrymen, Send me your Vicodin!
• She's The Type of Girl Who Always Remembers
• I always sound Irish when I'm trying to be charming
• The way things have always been done
• Who do you call for help when all your friends are dead?
• Even the tides have more friends than you
• I didn't have the heart to tell him I was lying about taco night, but at least the hellhound made some friends
• You have __ friends! (e2poll)
• Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned
• Bold of you to assume I have friends
• As always, the rifles have the last word
• Your radical ideas about religion as a mechanism of social control have already occurred to others
• Dreamy things people have said to me
• Who needs another person when you have yourself?
• It is not often that someone comes along who is a true friend and a good writer.
• Having an S on a transcript rather than a B
• You just have to tell me these things, okay?
• Who needs genetic cloning when we have The Gap?
• My brother is still dead... and now I have his car...
• Things Musicals Have Taught Me
• A list of things kids should and should not have from a woman who has no kids
• How does the Military Selective Service Act apply to individuals who have had a sex change?
• I have always considered warnings to be a kind of dare
• Guys who don't tell you they have a girlfriend
• If I win the bet, you have to pay me
• You should have killed me when you had the chance
• Don Quixote had his windmills, I have my helicopters
• Type A blood
• Trust me, I have a pineapple
• I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy
• Scientists who have genetically designed their children for superior 'fros
• Must never have dated my friend Emily
• We'll always have Paris
• You have no power over me
• The Story of Augustus who not have any Soup
• What I'm trying to say is that I may have unconsciously plagiarized this
• The campaign to have Jedi registered as a religion through the national census
• Perhaps pain will stop me where good sense and virtue have failed
• We know we have fallen because we know who we are
• The wheels are moving beneath me. I have not missed my train.
• You Should Never Have Asked Him About His Job!
• I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me
• Always Find Me in the Kitchen at Parties

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