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- 'just woke up' voice
- 40 disciples, 40 blood tests
- A game which involves running around at night with white plastic chairs
- A glass of tea
- A mob is just an army that doesn't know what it wants
- A modern long distance relationship
- acoustic coupler
- Adventures in the men's bathroom : A female perspective
- Adventures in the women's bathroom : A male perspective
- Alfredo sauce
- Alien abduction
- All I ever needed to know about unit conversion, I learned from drugs
- America if I only had the money. Here are your new commercials:
- An arms dealer, a drug dealer, and a thief...or, how I spent my New Years Eve
- Antarctic bars (place)
- Antarctic hygiene
- Antarctic hygiene (thing)
- Anybody who gets married before the age of 25 scares me a little
- Baseball players with mullets
- Batman: The Dark Knight Returns
- Be cool in college
- Beautiful things that have made you cry
- Beef stroganoff
- Beware: Children At Play
- Blow up a building with a sack of flour and two rounds of ammunition
- bogus registration information
- bootlegger turn
- Boy noises
- Brita plastic vodka test
- Bubble Bobble : the Opposite of Sex (idea)
- Building a still
- Bus drivers are people too
- bus-stop creeping
- Caffeinated Nasal Spray
- Calling for emergency help
- Can real love survive over time
- Capture the Flag with Stuff
- carbonated milk
- cargo pants
- cellular telephone as a weapon
- check engine
- Check yourself before you wreck yourself
- Cherry Street house
- Christiania
- CNN is more addictive than crack
- Co-driver
- Co-worker: pretzel-smoking man
- Coffee
- coffee pot telemetry
- Coffee-drinking Assholes
- College Guy Casserole
- Come home with me
- Comic Book Guy
- Comparing your insides to other people's outsides
- Compassion fatigue
- CONFICIONS SUSPIRMED!
- Conrad wants to know what I have been dreaming. This might get complicated.
- Console holds nine beers
- Conversation I overheard in the bookstore 5 min before end of my shift
- Courting that I didn't know was courting until it was too late
- Create a throwing star out of Post-it Notes
- culture jamming
- customer : good dad
- Dairy Farm Adventures
- Damn it feels good to be a nurturing male
- Dissed by a five-year-old
- Distillation
- Distillation of home brew
- Don't stop. You can sleep when you're dead.
- Dr's Hospital Adventure
- Drink from the cup as if it's already broken (idea)
- Dropping out of college is scary
- Dutch drug policy
- E2 has become my Internet (idea)
- Easter egging
- effeminate
- egg in a microwave oven
- Engineering Bridge at Camosun
- Even if we're not together
- Even my faults he adores
- Even though I sleep terribly with another body in the bed
- Ever seen two people talking to each other in their sleep?
- Every film needs a ninja
- Every time I look at this picture, I feel a little more in love
- Everything Bartender
- Everything Quote Server
- Everything User Search
- Falling in love
- Fish Heads
- Foolproof method to determine how much a person knows about computers
- free lunch (idea)
- Freeze, Motherstickers! This is a fuck-up!
- Front porch, what should have been said
- Geek's guide to working out
- Getting out of a traffic ticket
- Getting skunk spray off your pet
- Gimme some of that Jizzum
- Girls are hotter when they're comfortable
- Good reasons to miss someone
- Gother Than Thou
- Grapefruit moonshine beer explosion
- guy hug
- Hacking Stories
- Handbrake turn
- Happy Birthday From Planet Motherfucker
- Happy Birthday From Planet Motherfucker (idea)
- Hello, I take Zoloft. I am so gloriously mentally ill! You will love me, yes?
- Hello, my name is... Would you like to have sex?
- Helping someone who practices self-mutilation
- her lips on mine
- hobo dinner
- hobo signs
- homebrewing
- Homemade household cleaning agents (idea)
- How did I get here, Sarah?
- How did I get here, Sarah? (place)
- How did the matrix know what blue looked like?
- How I fell in love
- How to bake a cookie which doesn't come out as hard as a rock
- How to bake a cookie which doesn't come out as hard as a rock (idea)
- How to break a coconut (idea)
- How to build an emergency bat (idea)
- How to buy computer parts
- How to connect any cellular phone to a modem
- How to Cook Everything
- How to cook the perfect steak
- How to drag race a street car
- How to drag race a street car (idea)
- How to fall out of an airplane (idea)
- How to get past the alarm gates in retail stores
- How to get rid of a tailgater
- How to get the attention of unruly school children
- How to have an epileptic fit
- How to jump start a car
- How to re-IP a server without DNS lossage
- How to reach Enlightenment while checking groceries
- How to recover a lost Linux root or Windows 2000 Administrator password
- How to say "I can eat glass, it does not hurt me"
- How to solve a Rubik's Cube
- How to speak fake Russian
- How to speak to someone in a noisy room (idea)
- How to steal a street sign
- How to survive a toilet crisis during a party
- How to teach your teenager to drive (idea)
- How to tell if a girl's interested in you
- How to tell when a journalist has no idea what they're talking about
- How to urinate standing up
- Humorous Writings of E2
- I am going to rewrite you so that I can still like people.
- I am not an attractive man
- I can do shit with my legs
- I can make you howl. And vice versa. Let's get down to business.
- I do not want to talk
- I don't think I realized what I had gotten myself into, but it seemed like the potential for fun and insanity were there in equal parts (idea)
- I don't think I would want to date her now, anyway
- I got peanut butter on my ninja pants
- I have a good idea, smear crap on your face
- I have root on your head
- I hope there is someone in your life to tell you how beautiful you are
- I just had a pap smear, for crying out loud. Don't invite me out for coffee.
- I left you a note and you replied to it
- I never learned to dance
- I never thought I would node this
- I still can't think of anything, or how Fight Club changed my life
- I still miss you
- I suggest you dance. If you need a reason, I'm sorry.
- I will REMOVE your "All your radical touching base are already occurred to the lesbian monkey puppy" philosophy on me if you don't eat my soy google balls, hatt-baby. Real or malarky?
- I'll give up printf() when you pry my cold dead fingers from it
- I'm in this for the long haul
- I'm trippin' my nut sack into a frenzy of dik play
- Iced Brevet
- If 0=1, then I am the Pope
- If only I could get into her head
- If you meet the Buddha on the road, kill him
- If you're not smart enough to figure this out on your own, you shouldn't be doing it
- Increasing Horsepower
- Insulting softlinks
- Intangible gunshot wounds
- Intensely hilarious chess adventures
- Is there one large Matrix or is there one for each crop?
- It was just a crush
- It's a bird! It's a plane! It's sarcasm flying right over your head!
- It's always a good idea to tell people you love them if you do
- Keep doing it, but don't call it that
- Kissing a man all over his face
- Lemon icebox pie
- Less Than Jake: A Play
- Let's fuck this donkey
- Lighting a book match one-handed
- liquid nitrogen ice cream
- Long after bedtime I will wake up and sit crosslegged watching you. It is your fault for having your face.
- Losing a Tailing Car
- Love should not be routine habitual bliss
- M&M's standard operating procedure for bored engineers
- Mace Windu is a bad motherfucker
- Magic Coffee
- Making the Movies
- Male multiple orgasms
- Manufacturing Consent
- McDonald's
- Mersenne Twister
- Monkey! Bat! Robot Hat!
- Mozilla Everything2 Search Plugin
- mushin
- My cat does not naturally crave twenty pound ocean fish
- My dad is a crack whore magnet
- My Fascinatingly Detailed Teen Angst Bullshit Day Log - Part 1
- My Inability to Emote
- My roommates have ordered throwing stars
- My Two Dads (person)
- Nerds, geeks, dorks and losers
- Never trust a machine more complex than a knife and fork
- Next time don't drop acid and down a dozen shots right before the rehearsal dinner
- ninja infestation
- Ninja pine cone training
- No human artists have appeared in the Top 40 music chart for the past 5 years
- Noam Chomsky
- Nobody steals food you've bled on
- Nokia Secret Codes
- Not pulling a Graduate
- Note to self: be nice
- NOW NO SWIMS ON MON
- Of course we had it tough
- Old Chestnut
- Only my hours spent gaming will stand between our world and total destruction
- Only my hours spent gaming will stand between our world and total destruction (idea)
- Orange Traffic Koan
- Our rover can kick your lander's ass!
- Parallels in the two Star Wars trilogies (idea)
- Pascal's wager
- Pencil twirling
- People watching
- Philadelphia Experiment
- Pilots' Jargon
- Pink Floyd Synchronization phenomena
- Please let me out, I won't do it again
- pocket full of quarters (idea)
- power shifting
- Programming for a drug dealer
- Programming for a drug dealer (idea)
- Psilocybe cubensis
- Purplesaurus Rex
- Quake shareware CD
- Quantum Quake
- Quotes from sleeping people
- Rampant mass consumerism is so evil. Hey, can I have a sip of that Frappucino?
- Random strangers you remember
- Rebel by buying mass-market consumer products
- Risqué comment opportunities when you're a Subway employee
- Rockin' The Suburbs
- Saddest thing a woman friend ever told me
- Semaphore
- Sick Students and Kraft Dinner
- Sir, you are drunk!
- Sleeping in a car parked on the side of the road
- social engineering friendships
- Some of your peers who seem happy, popular, and self-confident are miserable
- Someone's been messing with my anti-paranoia medication!
- Something For Kate
- Somewhere there's a god who wants me
- Stop running
- Subaru Impreza WRX
- Suicide prevention
- Survivor2: Journal of the Bones (Endgame)
- Take Off My Pants and Tell Me You Love Me and I'll Laugh in Your Face and Call You a Slut
- Taking Down Large Larry
- TalkBox
- Talking like a pirate is fun but annoys people
- telemetry
- That torpedo did not self-destruct. You heard it hit the hull. And I... was never here.
- That's it. I quit team sanity.
- The 3AM visit by Jesus
- The Backdoor Skullfuck: A Tale Of Acquisition
- The cat is a liberal!
- The downfall of college students everywhere
- The Hacker's Kitchen Guide
- The hot girls from cold countries have scars you're not supposed to see (person)
- The Illuminatus! Trilogy
- The Lord is my shepherd; I shall drive like crap (idea)
- The McDonald's coffee lawsuit (thing)
- The Most Photographed Barn in America
- The night I saw a man get his head blown off
- The nine laws of physics which are most likely to kill you
- The number you have dialed is imaginary
- The philosophy of long hair
- The Pizza Chronicles
- The place where you were undone
- The porno angle (idea)
- The principles of nuclear weapon safety and meeting girls are remarkably similar (idea)
- The problem with the Chevrolet Caprice and the Ford Crown Victoria
- The reason dogs have cleaner mouths than us
- The Responsible Drug User's Oath
- The ringing has been drowned out by voices
- The sad thing is, if you get her you'll be sick of her in a year
- The Tao of Programming
- The Teenage Liberation Handbook
- The top secret of talking like an American
- The United States should go to war with everyone (idea)
- The Weakerthans
- The worst children's book ever
- The worst name ever
- There need to be better terms in English for "significant others"
- There's a drummer downstairs
- These aren't the droids you're looking for
- They hit each other, like fucking Christ intended!
- They Might Be Giants
- thief knot (thing)
- Things to do, if you are hard-core
- Things we say and do when we can't tell the truth
- This is our ool. Notice there is no P in it. Please keep it that way.
- This life is a placement test for the next
- three cop car barrier
- toonie
- Tricks of the Propagandist (idea)
- Uberman's Sleep Schedule
- Universal Life Church
- Until today, it really pissed me off that I'd become this totally centered Zen Master and nobody had noticed
- Unusual Japanese foods
- Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Start
- Using a Jedi Mind Trick on State Troopers
- Using the postal service to fight The Man and sell drugs is only good in theory
- Vaguely valid advice to prospective weight trainers
- Very high LSD dose account
- Vocoder
- Waiting for the screen to refresh
- Wanting to hear those quiet, even breaths at four in the morning
- Warning: Will ferment and turn into wine
- Watch out for falling meat
- Watching my mother die
- Water as an alternative to caffeine
- We do more after 2am than most people do all day.
- We'll burn that bridge when we get to it
- weird radio, deserts, ghost towns, diesel moons
- Welcome to 2002, the twenty-third year of the eighties (idea)
- Welcome to Everything
- What it's like to be raided by the FBI
- What the hell is Grimace, anyway?
- What to say when checking microphones
- What Would Jackie Chan Do?
- When life gives you lemons, just shut up and eat your damn lemons
- When the aliens attack my workplace, I'm going to be so damn READY
- When you ride alone you ride with Hitler!
- Why are socks so darn good?
- Why do we hurt when our loved ones die?
- You are precious to me. Did you know that?
- You are precious to me. Did you know that? (idea)
- You can't make an omelet without killing a few people
- You can't stop thinking of her: this is how you explained it, a proof of your being in love.
- you have to stop growing mushrooms in your dishwasher
- You know what? I've had it up to here with "Trix are for kids!" Give the rabbit a fucking bowl of cereal, you dick!
- You know you've done psychedelic drugs
- You sleep with someone for a couple of years, you get to know them by feel (idea)
- You wouldn't know it, but I think you're achingly beautiful (idea)
- You're laughing now, but I'm voting this sucka down
- You're the man now, dog!